Tumescence makes us think we need to endlessly shift conditions before we can return to Eros. The buildup of that un-potentiated energy sets us off on a wild goose chase for the perfect conditions to get what we want. What is needed is for us to penetrate the tumescent mind; then, conditions will naturally follow.
Tumescence utilizes scarcity as its primary tool—specifically, a scarcity of time. It has a running voice that says there is not enough time to sink in, relax, or enter the moment. It spends whatever time we have doing one of two things: thinking anxiously about a deadline or gripping tightly to the goal of completion, to check the activity off our to-do list.
That seeking is equivalent to seeking climax in the sexual realm. It robs us of everything we have experienced, from start to finish. Most importantly, it robs us of the excellence of operating from the Erotic mind.
Tumescence maintains its grip by presenting every worst-case scenario, bolstering fearful action and thought by focusing on what is not right or perfect to the ego-mind. The situation becomes so uncomfortable that we rush through it without focusing on the practice of excellence—keeping our attention on our connection to Eros so that we can access our intuition and wisdom.
The result is disappointing. We view ourselves as having failed to some degree, thus confirming our fears and sowing the seeds for the cycle to begin all over again.