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A Congruent Mind Seeks to Lose Well

Published June, 2024

The tumescent mind, being filled with a kind of hot air, cannot sink down to the place that lies below the content, below the appearance of things, to the place where our concern is not with the shifting ground but with the congruence of structure. In the natural mind, we are not buoyed about by the changing weather of public opinion and causes célèbres. We not only accept, but thoroughly enjoy opposing opinions, provided they match the level of congruence we employ with our own. In the natural mind, congruent opposition is a welcomed complement that balances, rather than takes us off-balance. 

— We do not need to collect and surround ourselves with like minds in order to bolster our “opinions”—we have internal structures to do that. —

In fact, we want our opinions and ideas pushed against in order to test their truth and the solidity of those structures. This occurs as healthy and enjoyable play rather than any kind of threat.

Internal Congruence

Without the internal congruence only the natural mind can build, any opposition is perceived as a threat. With internal congruence, these oppositions are welcomed, and we search out opinions that differ radically from our own but emanate from those who craft them as wholeheartedly as we do under the surface. It is from this place that greatness can arise, where unflinching differences can come together and exchange until all are better for it. 

Tumescent vs Erotic Mind

The tumescent mind is looking for a fight, a way to blow off steam, to scratch the itch of assertion of self. The Erotic mind is looking for a good grappling match. On the surface it may look similar, but they are very different: Where the tumescent mind is fighting to prove itself and prove itself right, the Erotic mind is wrestling for a deeper truth. 

— The tumescent mind hopes it can overcome its perceived opponent; the Erotic mind wins only when a truth between the two is revealed. —

It looks to go all out, releasing everything that is not true. The tumescent mind is looking only to exhaust itself and discharge uncomfortable energy. The Erotic mind is looking to lose fixed positions. It sees losing as winning, but it cannot submit to anything other than truth, so it will wrestle until the truth is revealed. 

— The tumescent mind tries to hold its opinions rather than be held by the truth. —

Making this one shift grants us the energy we need to enjoy our lives unconditionally.

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